7 things you probably didn’t know about having a baby.

October 2, 2017

Babies. Turning couples into families and adults into parents since the beginning of time. Cute squishy little bundles of love that can and probably will completely change your life. Everybody tells you about sleepless nights, changing bums how to test bath temperatures.  There is advice everywhere about how to dress them, where and how they should sleep, what to feed them etc but what about the stuff nobody tells you? Well, I’ve got a couple of things to tell you that nobody else will.


  1. Firstly, YOU DONT KNOW SHIT!
    Everyone is an expert. Everyone knows best. Everyone except you. Especially if this is your first baby. Or at least… that’s how it will feel. But that’s not true at all. You will know your baby better than anyone. Doesn’t mean people will hold back on the advice though. Expect a LOT of it. Mostly contradicting.
  2. OMG Is she breathing?
    You will never not be able to check their breathing. You see them lying peacefully in their sleep but they are so completely still. They make no sound whatsoever and then suddenly you panic. You get a little smidge of doubt in your head so you watch to make sure they are actually breathing. If they are in a sleeping bag or a blanket sometimes its harder to tell so you put your hand on them to feel the breaths. You will do this forever now.
  3. The Startle reflex.
    Occasionally, while in that nice snooze where you’ve had to check they’re breathing, they will suddenly jump! Perfectly normal, the startle reflex normally wears off after about 3 months but up until then, your baby can seem quite jerky and jumpy.
  4. Parents are horribly competitive. Is he sitting yet?

    Gerald was sitting at 5 months, but he is quite advanced for his age and he can already count to 10…. thousand…. in 4 languages…. backwards…. while standing on his head!

    Wellllll, Good for Gerald! No, Really, I mean it… But you see, the thing is… how fast a child learns to walk, talk, read or write has absolutely no bearing on how well a child can walk, talk, read or write. It’s hard not to worry about some of these things with your first born but I’m on my 3rd now and honestly, I couldn’t give less of a shit. She’ll learn things when she learns them. I’m just happy to enjoy her as she is. The baby stage goes far too quickly.

  5. Every new stage will become your favourite! They’re so beautiful when they sleep as a newborn and so tiny and calm. Then they start smiling and its the best thing ever. Then they giggle and that’s even better than a smile. And then they roll over or sit or crawl and you are amazed even more every single time. Then they say mama and.. well! #HeartMelt
  6.  You will google the craziest shit. At 3 am normally. And you’ll also probably freak out a bit. Should their poo look like that? Are they supposed to make that noise? Why are they so jumpy? Should your boobs really be that big? And what about that cord? How far can you spray breast milk? Wait, I didn’t google that!?! And those are the more mild ones…
  7. They wear so much stuff! You will probably never see the bottom of your laundry basket for more than a couple of hours for the next 18 years. Make your peace with it now.



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  • Reply Sarah | Boo Roo and Tigger Too October 2, 2017 at 6:58 am

    Yes yes, yes to all of this. I do think even want to think about the number if times I checked my first born breathing #Blogtober17

    • Reply Leslie Rickerby October 2, 2017 at 7:25 am

      I still do it with my third!!

  • Reply Julz October 2, 2017 at 8:12 am

    Five children in and still have no idea what i am doing. Great Post!

    • Reply Leslie Rickerby October 2, 2017 at 5:22 pm

      3 here and I’m the same. Hahaha

  • Reply Debs October 2, 2017 at 8:37 am

    Yes to all of them, especially the “you don’t know shit”. I remember when my first son was born, the midwife took him off me to put him in the cot. I then had to ask a cleaner to pick him up and pass him to me because I genuinely had no idea how to pick him up, that first time mum fear that he was too fragile!

    • Reply Leslie Rickerby October 2, 2017 at 5:21 pm

      I thought I knew a decent amount when I had my first. I had loads of younger siblings, nieces and nephews etc… Turns out, I knew nothing. At alllll

  • Reply Nicolette Lafonseca October 2, 2017 at 9:28 am

    This is true and hillarious

    • Reply Leslie Rickerby October 2, 2017 at 5:18 pm

      Ha ha thank you

  • Reply Cherry Newby October 2, 2017 at 10:13 am

    I loved this! Although we didn’t adopt our children until they were 3 and 5, I can agree with pretty much everything you’ve said!

    • Reply Leslie Rickerby October 2, 2017 at 5:18 pm

      I particularly like ‘every new stage’. Right now my eldest has just started school so I’ve never been a school mum before. It’s a whole new experience

  • Reply Kim October 2, 2017 at 11:23 am

    hahaha! I love this. It made me laugh out loud…
    It’s so true! We know nothing, especially with our first.

    • Reply Leslie Rickerby October 2, 2017 at 5:14 pm

      Nope, not a thing! How on earth do we get through the days?

  • Reply Sarah October 2, 2017 at 12:29 pm

    Looking back I can’t believe how clueless I was – I remember coming home from hospital and thinking ‘what am I supposed to do now??’ Great post 🙂 #Blogtober

    • Reply Leslie Rickerby October 2, 2017 at 5:12 pm

      Haha Yes! I felt like I was babysitting for a day or so, I kept expecting someone to come and get him

  • Reply Rhi October 2, 2017 at 1:38 pm

    I do the breathing checks too even if I can hear him snuffling -just in case. I’m as neurotic googling as I was with my other two. Imagine parenting without google?

    • Reply Leslie Rickerby October 2, 2017 at 5:09 pm

      Parenting without google… Sounds like a challenge I don’t fancy taking on!

  • Reply Helen Newberry October 2, 2017 at 3:23 pm

    These made me chuckle, especially the first one.

    The greatest advice I ever got was from my GP (who saw me yet again with a high temp/rash/coughing baby) who said – “You are his mum and you know him best. I would rather see a hundred mums like you and everything be fine than for one mum think she was wasting my time, stayed away and it turned out to be serious. NEVER let anyone tell you otherwise. You will pick up on little cues that we would just miss.”

    • Reply Leslie Rickerby October 2, 2017 at 5:09 pm

      Aww that’s great coming from a GP! All too often you hear of the opposite being said about them

  • Reply Lucie Aiston October 2, 2017 at 3:59 pm

    Haha!!! Yes to it All!! This makes so much sense!! Especially the everyone’s advice!!


    • Reply Leslie Rickerby October 2, 2017 at 5:08 pm

      I know, right? Everyone is an expert! Haha

  • Reply Zoe L October 2, 2017 at 5:20 pm

    Haha yes! I love this. Totally relate to the laundry basket. I did all of ours this morning, even bedding. Got excited then Isla made a mess and that was in the basket “/

    • Reply Leslie Rickerby October 2, 2017 at 5:22 pm

      Oh it’s never-ending, isn’t it!?

  • Reply Maria - wrexhammama October 2, 2017 at 9:24 pm

    Loved this post heh very true! Everytime Logi did something new, like a giggle or a smile id have to record it just so i could show it off!! hehe #Blogtober2017

    • Reply Leslie Rickerby October 3, 2017 at 6:44 am

      Awwww I love the ‘new stages’

  • Reply Alex October 2, 2017 at 9:45 pm

    Yes to all of them ha! Especially the never ending washing pile! I’ve only one and I can’t keep up! #blogtober

    • Reply Leslie Rickerby October 3, 2017 at 6:45 am

      Me either, I’ve just accepted that this is my life now! Laundry maid til the end of time!

  • Reply Karen Malpass October 2, 2017 at 10:47 pm

    I’m there with no.6 – I wonder if Google’s engineers keep a list of “crazy shit” people type into their search engine to have a good laugh at at there next staff function?

    • Reply Leslie Rickerby October 3, 2017 at 6:46 am

      Oh, can you imagine?! I shudder at my search history!

  • Reply Raimy October 3, 2017 at 11:33 am

    I get excited when my washing basket is half full and not overflowing!

    • Reply Leslie Rickerby October 3, 2017 at 1:51 pm

      Haha exactly that!

  • Reply Lisa (mummascribbles) October 3, 2017 at 1:32 pm

    I love this so much! The googling of randomness!! Been giggling along! #blogtober17

    • Reply Leslie Rickerby October 3, 2017 at 1:52 pm

      Haha, I dread to think what my search history looks like!

  • Reply Kate October 4, 2017 at 12:48 pm

    Ha ha yes I have googled just about everything since becoming a mum! How did they cope before the internet?!

    • Reply Leslie Rickerby October 4, 2017 at 12:59 pm

      Well, I wondered this, but I think everyone was a lot closer weren’t they. If you go back 50/60 years, everyone knew all of their neighbours and knew each other’s business because they spoke more.

  • Reply Janet Yarwood October 5, 2017 at 9:16 pm

    Haha I love this. Yes to every single one but especially googling the craziest things at silly I clock in the morning

    • Reply Leslie Rickerby October 5, 2017 at 9:59 pm

      Oh,I know right? Anyone that says they’ve never done that is telling big fat fibs!

  • Reply Man November 3, 2017 at 10:58 pm

    All so true, although thank goodness Google didn’t exist when I had my first! I remember getting up for the night feeds and changing her nappy every time, she would then be wide awake for hours! By the time number two came along he went most of the night in one nappy!

    • Reply Leslie Rickerby November 5, 2017 at 5:54 pm

      Yes to this! No night time nappy changes here either, unless there’s poo involved!

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